Oscar, Oscar (or Uncle, Uncle)

I could either stab myself with a number two pencil in the eye or try to write a blog while watching the Oscars. Or I could amuse myself by looking at notes from this year’s NFL combine.

Leodis McKelvin “feels he has great hips, likes to tackle, and has an all around game with his return skills.” He also likes puppies and long walks on the beach.

Justin King, a cornerback from Penn State, wants to show at the combine that he knows how to backpedal. Somehow he managed to not do that in three years at Penn State.

Chris Johnson of East Carolina ran a 4.24 40. If I could put on some rocket-powered in-line skates, I might be able to pull off a 4.8.

At the end of the 40, the player should have to catch a brand new k ball (perhaps the one Tomy Romo fumbled in that playoff game) and if they don’t catch it, the 40 time doesn’t count.

I feel bad that wideout De’Cody Fagg, who got injured running a route during warmups. It would be cool for him to be a teammate of Randall Gay.

Thanks. I’ll be here all night. I may have to gouge out my eardrums if I have to hear another song from Enchanted.

According to Rivals.com, Barry Richardson lost draft stock due to being a waist-bender. I didn’t know that was a bad thing.

I have to give Will Franklin, the Mizzou product, props for running a 4.37 40 time. He wasn’t as large a part of the offense this year as in his junior year. Maybe he’ll catch on.

I heard that the Titans wouldn’t re-sign Justin Gage. So they can’t shoe-horn him in with their $40 million in cap room?

Do punters and kickers run the 40? They should.

Congratulations to Jeff Fisher on his divorce. I think “inappropriate marital conduct” is going to be a 15-yard penalty next year.

“Falling Slowly” from Once. Now that’s a song.

From a message board, talking about running backs: “(Kevin) Smith may take more time to develop, but he has the best hips of any back I’ve seen in years.”

I tell you, the only two times people look at hips are during the NFL draft and looking for a child-bearing mate. Considering the high number of Caesarean sections, maybe the draft is the only time that hips are considered, except for when old men fall down.

Man this broadcast is long. This is like watching the Ravens/Giants Super Bowl again. With commercials.

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